WARSAME DIGITAL MEDIA (WDM)
In the twilight of Hassan Sheikh Mohamud’s second reign — a tenure best described as “busy abroad, bankrupt at home” — the hyenas are circling the carcass of Villa Somalia. The scent of decaying legitimacy has spread far beyond the marble walls of Mogadishu, attracting three familiar packs of political predators, each convinced it was born to “save the nation” from the very mess it helped create.
The First Pack: Damul Jadiid — The Monks of Manipulation
Once the self-anointed reformist movement, Damul Jadiid has now aged into a cynical cult of survivalists. They speak the language of “vision,” but practice the religion of “position.” The group that promised to modernize Somalia now specializes in manufacturing smokescreens, distributing ministries among loyal disciples, and sending “technical advisers” who can’t distinguish between a constitution and a campaign slogan. Their slogan remains unspoken but clear: If it moves, politicize it; if it breathes, tax it; if it questions, exile it.
The Second Pack: Golaha Mustaqbalka — The United Front of Disunity
Enter the self-proclaimed “Future Council” — Golaha Mustaqbalka — a confusing coalition of Puntland, Jubaland, and Mogadishu’s restless opposition. United only by mutual distrust of Villa Somalia, this fragile front looks like a camel trying to sing in harmony. Puntland wants autonomy, Jubaland wants security, Banadir wants recognition — and none wants to share the microphone. Their slogan might as well be: “Together, apart.”
They meet in posh hotels, issue lengthy communiqués, and hold press conferences to condemn the government for corruption — before retiring to private dinners sponsored by the same business cartels they denounce.
The Third Pack: Sirdoon & The Shadow Broker
Then comes the intelligence gang — former Prime Minister Sirdoon and his one-time puppeteer, Fahad Yasin, Somalia’s self-made Machiavelli. Having divorced Farmaajo in public but not in ambition, they now lurk in the alleys of regional politics, exchanging dossiers and whispering alliances. In the chessboard of Somali politics, these two are not players; they are the smoke between the pieces. Their plan: restore order by reclaiming control of chaos.
And Farmaajo, the silent watcher, plays his old trick again — pretending neutrality while secretly measuring the curtains for Villa Somalia’s windows. To the untrained eye, he looks detached; to seasoned observers, he’s counting the spoils before the gunfire starts.
Foreign Investors in Somali Politics Inc.
No Somali election is complete without Emirati and Qatari sponsorships. Doha funds “vision,” Abu Dhabi funds “stability” — both fund instability. Somalia’s ballot box is now a diplomatic ATM. The Arabs play their favorite sport: “Bet on every horse, collect from the winner.” The result is a federation of beggars, each state auctioning loyalty to the highest bidder.
The Predictable Tragedy
The tragedy is not that these men compete; it’s that they all have already ruled and failed. Each carries a record of mismanagement, missed opportunities, and miraculous self-enrichment. None offers a vision beyond “I should be president next.” Somalia, therefore, is not electing leadership — it is recycling leadership.
As the next political storm brews, the public watches with weary eyes. The choice remains the same: between incompetence, corruption, and manipulation. The only suspense left is who will hold the key to the treasury when the music stops.
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