Garowe, May 25, 2019

Residents of Hargeisa, Berbera and Burco are a confedaration of loose, fantasy sub-clans politically branding themselves into belonging to one clan under the fictional clan name of Issak. The name Somaliland is interchangeably used for Issak as well, not aware that very name of Somaliland is the same name for entire Somalia. As a Somali clan, they have been suffering from identity crisis for the past three decades, often calling themselves, and/or accepting different clan affiliations of fictional nature like “IRIR”, and lately accepting the name offer of “DIR”. Fantasy tribal names of their origin are abundant among them like belonging to the tribe of Prophet Mohammed (SCWS) of Quresh. Some of them even claim to be the lost tribe of Israel, a severe identity and psychological crisis. Their dilemma is that they were unable to figure out a new original name for their attempt to secede from the rest of the country to become another annoying begging basket for the international community. Going back to the name of British Protectorate is not saleable to the people there, and to Britain alike. We wonder whether they had even spent a little time to think of a name for their illusionary dream of becoming a poor would-be independent country.

They have no resources of their own to sustain lives and lead a modicum of fedgling economy. Their small portion of the Gulf of Aden on the Red Sea is almost devoid of marine resources. They have no livestock to talk about other than what they buy from Ogaden and Central Somalia’s regions. They also buy frankincense and gum from Puntland to re-export them. They now live on hand-outs from NGOs and international organizations with some shaky, suspicious and secret budget support from certain countries bent to undermine Somali unity. Dahabshiil money transfer and remittance Co. draws its funds from customers in the rest of Somalia. Their role model country they dream of is Djibouti, a small enclave, which had received huge and unproportionable money, manpower and minds of Somalia to squeeze out itself from French colonialism for nominal independence, and the threats of being swallowed by Somalia’s competitor, Ethiopia.

As the Djibouti economy was dependent then on decadent nightclub lifestyles of French Foreign Legion stationed there, Somalia had to open development and investment banks to build houses for the Djibouti destitutes. Following the collapse of Somalia’s Central Government and vicious civil war that broke out, thousands fled to Djibouti for safety. It turned out to be one man’s trouble is another man’s opportunity. Djibouti had started trying to fit into Somalia’s shoes on the World stage. The break for Djibouti came about during Arta Conference for Somali National Reconciliation Talks in 2000. Predident Bush’s War On Terror was the 2nd Djibouti survival breakthrough, no more dependence on nightclub businesses of the French Foreign Legion only. When I visited Djibouti last time 20 years ago the entire its young female population used to dress up in the evening for the town’s nightlife. Then, there was stiff competition for the attention of young men of French Foreign Legion at Djibouti nightclubs between the locals and illegal female immigrants from Ethiopia, another country famous for that particular old trade as well.

So, Djibouti as strategic foreign military bases, has already taken away the pipedreams of delusional bunch of loosely related sub-clans in Hargeisa, Berbera and Burco, known derogatively in Somali circles as the “Three Bedrooms” of the Northwest Regions.

Political pipedreamers there had tried every act of treason to realize the impossible and tried hard to cut deals with the devil.

What they didn’t tried yet is how to come up with a name other than Somali-land, which is the same name of the country, Somalia. We are also not so sure of them seeking advice from the more experienced tiny Djibouti on how to survive on a life of one city staying afloat on foreign slodiers’ decadence and foreplays in town alone. Who needs another begging basket?

Better remain Somali.

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