By Ismail H. Warsame
Warsame Digital Media (WDM)
The Feline Coup in Garowe
There was a time when Garowe’s hotels proudly displayed manicured gardens — symbols of hospitality, order, and Puntland’s claim to urban civilization. Today, those same gardens have been seized — not by political militias, not by opposition parties, but by cats. Yes, the new rulers of Garowe come with whiskers, claws, and an entitlement only rivaled by certain government officials.
Garowe’s hotel gardens have been quietly converted into open-air toilets for the city’s fast-multiplying feline population. What used to be green serenity for tea and diplomacy is now a battlefield of mating yowls, foul odors, and territorial disputes. At night, these furry anarchists organize what sounds like a constitutional conference — perhaps to ratify The Republic of Meowland under the slogan: “We came, we saw, we sprayed.”
Uncontrolled In-House Proliferation: A Hygiene Apocalypse
This is not a joke anymore — it’s an environmental and public health emergency disguised in fur. Behind every hotel wall, a new litter is born every week. These are not pampered pets. These are feral freeloaders — thriving in garbage, breeding unchecked, spreading fleas, and converting respectable courtyards into biological minefields.
The foul smell of cat droppings is unbearable around these once-beautiful hotel gardens. The air itself has become heavy, infected with a nauseating odor that drives away both guests and common sense. What used to be the pride of Garowe’s hospitality industry has turned into an olfactory nightmare — a testament to how civic neglect can literally stink to high heaven.
Of Leaders and Litter Boxes
Garowe’s situation is a perfect metaphor for Puntland’s current governance: overrun by unregulated forces, lacking supervision, and thriving on negligence.
When the government cannot manage basic urban hygiene, what hope is there for democracy or security?
Imagine the scene — dignitaries arriving from abroad to find a cat parade in the hotel garden. One foreign visitor reportedly said, “I thought these were holy cats protected by local law.” Indeed, in Garowe today, the cat enjoys more freedom of movement than the average citizen.
There was once a Garowe Mayor named Ahmed Barre, who still jokes about my early warnings regarding the invasion of cats and goats in Garowe. Every time he sees me in town, he laughs and says:
“Ismail, tell me about the cats in Garowe,”
As if I were somehow responsible for his political downfall — as if my critique of his feline administration haunted his mayoral days!
Yet, not all establishments have surrendered to the feline invasion. Certain hotels, notably Martisoor and Rugsan, have found a way around this problem — discreetly, effectively, and without waiting for municipal miracles. Their courtyards are clean, their nights quiet, and their guests relieved. It seems they’ve mastered the art of feline diplomacy — firm, silent, and decisive.
WDM Conclusion: Declaw the Disorder
If this continues, WDM proposes a tongue-in-cheek but deadly serious intervention:
1. Declare a Feline Emergency — appoint a Minister of Cat Control.
2. Launch Operation Litter Freedom — mass sterilization, not speeches.
3. Reclaim Hotel Gardens — turn them back into symbols of urban decency, not cat kingdoms.
Garowe, the proud heart of Puntland, deserves better than this creeping animal anarchy. Hygiene is not a luxury — it’s a moral indicator of civilization. When cats rule the courtyards and leaders chase vanity projects, the city’s soul begins to rot — and the stench isn’t just from the gardens anymore.
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WDM © 2025 — “Talking Truth to Power (and Paws)”
Garowe’s cats have declared independence. Now who will liberate the city from them?
Warsame Policy & Media Network (WAPMEN) 